MARCH 2, 2012

2;00 am

Dear Natdem,

Im writing this down because i cant sleep thinking about things this morning. I took you to the airport because you have to go to manila for your masteral. I am so proud of you. I feel like the luckiest guy alive to be with you. As i walk towards the exit of the airport, passing along people along that steep slope to climb my foot heading towards the huge gray metal gates, I began feeling so small against the world, and people, cars, and their lives starting the day. I thought about my own self and im the poorest man without you. I feel ashamed of myself as I have literally nothing but dole-outs and my little savings with me. I think about schooling and my friends who have passed the bar, and i felt confused and lost that after you were gone i asked myself loudly , "what now?". I have no idea where to go, not only about getting home and where to get a jeep, but also with my life. I stand in the corner of the road and I resolve my predicament. I looked back at myself and realized that I have nothing to be complaining about but only to be grateful  Im so thankful that you love me so much. Your love is so strong that even just by looking at your eyes, the soul in me is calmed. By the nearness of you my worries disappear. By your smile I am willing to live a miserable life. Natdem, today as I write this down I have  nothing in my life but you. Thank you for loving me. For seeing the good in me when I even hate how i have become. I may not be the best person in the world for you. I may not even become a lawyer or a successful person. I may have not own a thing or become somebody. My dreams would not even become real. I may have even failed the most things in my life. But its okay, I am fine because i have you. You are my greatest accomplishment. You are my dream that has come true. I could say tonight that i have loved living my life only because you have been in it. Thank you and im sorry for the imperfections and shortness of myself. I love you.

Albert

Dear albert,

As I woke up this morning, I thought of you and paused for a while. It came to my mind that today is our monthsarry but I can hardly remember if how many months we've together now. All I know was that we celebrated our 4th anniversary last May. It's funny to think that even though we've been together for 4 years now, we are still celebrating our relationship by months. Just like now, i cannot remember and it makes me so tired to count the months. Hehehe. Anyway, happy monthsarry sweetiepie andnim still hoping that one day, we will be together not just for 4 years and 3 months but for eternity.

Aside from our monthsary, I also would like to greet you a happy birthday. You're already 28 years old. Just a cuople of years, you will be in your 30s. You're getting old. Hehehe. I'm grateful that even if we are getting older, you're love for me is still the same. I 'm so happy that you are loving me regardless of the things that happened in the past and regardless of my imperfections.

I want you to know that I love you so much and I want you to be happy always. I'll do anything just for you to feel good about yourself. I hope you can borrow my eyes so you will see how perfect you are. I hope you will not anymore feel bad about yourself, your illnesses, your imperfections, and your failures. You are great and awesome. Nobody is perfect but you are made perfect for me.

I am glad that you stood by me all throughout my masters years. You are editing my work and coaching me what to do, what to think, how to do it, and how to think. Many people are thinking that I am smart but they did not know that behind this smart girl, there is you. I cannot imagine how my papers would look like without you. Both of us know that I am not good in writing and grammar. I owe my success to you. I just hope that I can land on a better job after this masters degree. I am so grateful for loving me still despite the distance that separates us. Thank you for being so patient at times when I am being so cruel.

Words cannot express my gratitude to you for loving me this big. I love you too so much. I cannot wait to see you. I'll give you my birthday and monthsary gift when you get here nextweek. See you soon sweetiepie. Iloveyou.

Dear Natdem,

I cannot compute how long have we been together in months. We have been together for a long time now and been through almost anything in life. Despite of the ups and downs we managed to keep ourselves together.

Today marks my 28th birthday and I cannot imagine how fast the time passes by. I still remember the first day I saw you. I was only 23 and was still adjusting to normal life. I have never gone out with a girl in my entire life that it made that moment memorable than anything else. When I first saw you, my heart followed you like a man who follows the pathway the way to his home. Our beginning wasnt perfect, but was neither immaterial. For have those things never happened, I may have never truly valued what we have today.

I remember everything we have been through as if I had a second life and it started with you. I remember how brave you were in difficult times. I remember how strong and hardworking you are to reach the desires of your heart. I have seen you progress into an even wonderful smart woman in more ways than I could imagine. I am proud of you, and all the things you have achieved.

Thank you Natdem for loving me when I myself find it impossible to do. Thank you for understanding me, and still choosing me despite of my health problems and incompetencies. I am not an ideal boyfriend and my weaknesses bring insecurity nearby. I am grateful for your love because it has allowed me comfort and assurance to make these sufferings worthwhile. I am a lucky man to be your boyfriend. I only ask you to allow my entire lifetime to pay you in return.

I love you . Happy Monthsary.
Albert