09 May 2011

Dear Albert,

Happy Anniversary.

We've been through a lot of trials. Our love was tested. I thought I'm gonna loose you. I'm so much happy cause you are still with me. I'm happy cause you are still loving me up to this point. Three years is quite so long. I cant believe that love at first sight is true cause that's what I feel when the first time I saw you three years ago. I'm glad that I'm still pondering on that feelings and it keeps on growing until now. You are my answered prayer. I'll be a million times thankful for having you in my life. I can only live once. And I'd like to spend my whole lifetime with you. And even if I can live a million times, I will still spend my whole chances of living with you.

I know it's you.

Happy anniversary. I love you.

Love,

Natdem

May 4 2011

Dear Natdem,

I write this letter because I could not sleep, and my thoughts keep following you. As I write this letter I see your beautiful face. The one that has been with me all through these years. I write again to thank you for holding on to the times that i couldnt. I am so grateful that you stood by me despite of the difficulty of dealing my shortcomings.

Although it sound pretty odd to say this , but I am grateful for the pain and problems we had to encounter. Ironically, breaking up with you was the best thing that ever happened to us. Not because I got tired of us, but because it only proved the things that I have always doubted to be untrue.

I love you natdem. I always have and i guess i have no choice but to love you, because I know no other way than this.

Albert

03April2011

Dear Albert,

If it comes in your mind to visit this site and happened to read this, this is the day you said you don't want me anymore and you don't anymore have a single feeling of love left for me. And this is the day i felt that it is true. I want you to know that today,my life ended. Today,i stop hoping,loving,and i wanna stop living.

You are the only person that I got and proud to call mine. Now that you're gone,I feel so empty and I only got nothing but a life miserable to live. I don't want to let go but I have to coz you want me to. You showed me how it was to love and be loved in return. I saw how you remain faithful and steadfast against all the trials this life can offer. As I hear you say,you don't want me anymore,my heart is crushed,cut a million times and I don't know how to mend these broken pieces for you are the only one who can make this as what you always do.

You've changed a lot. Where's now your faith and hope that I always used to see and feel. You're faith, hope, and love are where I'm finding strength. How can I stand up now when I only got nothing but my weak and poor self to rely on.

I love you so much, Albert and I don't think I can still love again if it's not you. My love for you will always resounds even down to my grave. My love for you is true and eternal and forever echoes in this abyss. I want to say I'm sorry for all the things that caused you pain. I'm sorry for your broken dreams and sacrifices. I'm sorry for falling out of love with me. I'm sorry for all the ugly words I've said. Well,I guess,when a person is mad or angry,he/she says ugly words he/she did'nt mean. I didn't mean everything I've said that hurt you. I'm sorry for evrything.

I want you to know also that nothing compares to the happines I have by just looking at you closely. I can't explain the completenes I have when I hold your hand. You don't know how it feels to finally find a resting place when you hug me. Oh how lovely the words "i love you" when it is uttered by you. By just sitting beside you, I felt so secured.

If only I could face Heavenly Father, I'd kneel at His feet and asked you in His hands and I'd be willing to bear all the consequences whatever it takes just to have you through eternity. Albert, I just don't know how to face the next one minute of my life, without you in it. You are my strength and you are my life. How can I be strong and accept all these pains when you are my only strength and courage to move on? How can I be happy without you when you are the happiness that fills my world? How can I live without you when you are my life?

I just don't know what to do but pray harder to conquer all these burdens and pains. I have nothing but my hopeless state, trying to hope for nothing ahead. I just hope everything will be alright and everything will just come to pass. (Oh God, please give me strength. Help me all through these.)

I keep praying and hoping that you are still my answered prayer.

I love you.

Natdem